Sue's notes to self

I learnt a song once, the gist of which was “‘Whatever the weather, we weather the weather, whether we like it or not.” Obvious really, but increasingly difficult in some places.

I am not built for heat, having too much padding. I much prefer a nice chill, but not too cold. At least when it’s cold you can add layers, it being hard to take off more layers when you have gone down to one and are still hot. This year I seriously considered buying a paddling pool to sit in if necessary. The downside being that I would probably struggle to get back out of it if I did. Such is life!

As we live in the temperate zone we don’t usually get the same extremes of weather that other regions ‘enjoy’. British weather is unpredictable in many ways, as you can experience storms, snow, rain, sleet, wind, sunshine, fog and more in just one day. When we want rain we get too much sun and so we complain, itching to just go and stand outside in a cooling downpour. When we have too much rain we long for the sun to shine. We are, quite frankly, never satisfied. But then, what would we talk about if our weather was not so changing?

When packing to go away, especially if staying in the country, or just leaving the house for a while, we have to be prepared for anything. Weather forecasts can be as unreliable as the weather. I have to laugh when we spend our time checking the weather apps when looking out the window often gives us the answer we need. If only forecasting was more accurate.

There are many weather proverbs in our English language, often with their variations. “Red sky at night, shepherd’s (sailor’s) delight. Red sky in the morning shepherd’s (sailor’s ) warning.” What that one doesn’t take into account is in which direction the said sky is that colour. Apparently it makes quite a difference. When I was at work, we used to joke with the team leader that ‘red sky in the morning Canvey’s burning.’ It seemed funny then, but not so much now. I often look out for cows sitting down when we are on a journey, only to be told it has nothing to do with the weather, they are just tired. I’ve watched out for oak and ash trees to see what summer is going to be like, which apparently is a better predictor, based on the root systems of the specific trees. As I never make a proper note I can’t tell how accurate it is. And as for St Swithin, well he can hardly be relied upon.

We also have lots of weather related idioms. A favourite must be ‘raining cats and dogs’. I fail to see how this comes into it, as most cats avoid the rain if at all possible. I’ve certainly felt under the weather, especially when I am snowed under. I don’t go in for stealing anyone’s thunder, nor do I often have my head in the clouds. How could you tell if they had a silver lining anyway? I could go on, it would be a breeze, but let’s take a rain check on that.

Why am I worrying about the weather just now? Last weekend we were really blessed here to have a fine two days so that our planned events could happen outside in the garden. Right now I’d welcome the rain so I don’t have to worry about the plants I put in. Never satisfied, see. Judging by the achy joints (including the titanium one) there may well be a bit of rain today. Looking out the window works too, there are lots of clouds, though no flat-bottomed ones, it’s just generally overcast.

However, to get to the point of this veritable deluge of weathery words, we do have to worry about the weather. If we are not careful we will no longer be able to weather the weather that hits this little island, where even the opposite sides of the house can be rain or shine. I reckon those who insist on naysaying global warming and the climate crisis have got their heads in the sand, because they are sure aren’t noticing the clouds. It pains and saddens me to think that some of those apocalyptic films which start with extreme conditions might actually happen.

There will come a time when I won’t just be trying to decide what clothes to wear for the weather, or whether I should get my hair cut short to avoid looking like a bedraggled rat when I have got too hot. I will instead have to seriously consider moving to somewhere that doesn’t flood, isn’t too near a forest, or too near the sea, or is subject to frequent hosepipe bans.

Around the world there are many who have to weather the weather in far more extremes that we do. Although I prefer to write for amusement, in this case it is no laughing matter. Wake up everyone and smell the roses, while there are still roses growing. Wake up politicians and listen, you may be able to escape to somewhere else when the ice cap melts and little Britain disappears beneath the waves, but we can’t all do that. None of you is King Cnut to stop the tide coming in. Get out from behind your dark glasses and actually look at what is happening, whether you like it or not.

August 18th 2023